The day at Universal

Oh my gee golly gumpkins! I went on the Shrek 4D ride...wait...I'm getting ahead of myself.

I love Disney. I love all the parks and all the cheesy rides and all that jazz. But Universal has become my new mistress. You know, the park on the side...just don't tell Disney. I can't afford the Disney Vacation Club membership ($16,000+) to calm Disney down.

Anyway...the rides at Universal were so much cooler than the rides at Disney. The movies are a bit cooler. So, let me give you a rundown of the day. (NOTE: DISNEY RIDES ARE MUCH MORE CLASSIC AND WHEN KATIE AND I TAKE MEGHAN AND DEREK'S KIDS, WE WILL ONLY DO DISNEY.)

We first saw that the Simpson's ride wasn't open (doh!) but Derek and Meghan stopped at the Kiwk-e-Mart. The phone lines went down so they couldn't pay with credit card. And apparently the fake-Abu was a bit on the slow side. Katie's melt-down-o-meter was spiking. She needs to chill. Mine was near spiking too (because she wouldn't shut up). I need to do crack.

Then we hit Men In Black: Alien Attack. Which was wicked awesome! We got a nice picture, although I uber-sucked. After MIB, we went to Jaws, which was kinda cool, although it was kinda cheesy. There was fire. Fire made it better. Post-Jaws we went on Mummy...which was freaking awesome! It could have gone faster, but that only would have made it more awesomer.

We did Twister, thinking that it was a spinny ride, but it was kinda cheesy. But without fire. I saw the Blues Brothers (in the Blues-mobile with the speaker...aren't you jealous, Ross???) and we ate and did Fear Factor Live. I almost queefed. Not because of the Fear Factor crap, but because the melon I ate was rotten and made me feel greener than the microwaved Wendy's burger. After near-vomitation, we began the walk out of the park, which still involved hitting several attractions.

We saw the Rocky Horror Universal Make-up Show thing activity...which was definitely not KID (Keep it Disney). It was awesome. Then we did ET (maybe reverse order...I don't really remember...it's just a big fun (?) blur) which was so cool. The ET looked at me!! It looked at me!!! AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!! And it said my name!

Terminator 2 3D was awesome...best 3D effects I've seen in Orlando. Don't think that it freaked Mrs. J out as much, because we didn't hear her scream. Then we did Jimmy Neutron's ride which was like Star Tours, just not Star Wars-y. Then we did Shrek, which was awesome (albeit just Shrek 3-D on comfy massage-y chairs). I love Shrek. I got a stuffed Shrek, a stuffed Donkey and a stuffed Puss in Boots. Then we did more shopping and ate at Hard Rock cafe. Where I sat in a room with a bass from John Entwhistle, an acoustic from Carlos Santana, an acoustic from Neil Young and a guitar from Jimi Hendrix! What a room! All my guitar idols in one room. Then we went mini golfing.

Katie and Jenn whined so much that we didn't do the mini golf course that I had wanted to go do. We had fun, but I was the one who wanted to golf...it's OK...I'm going to spit on Katie (by accident) on one of the rides.

We're off to Islands of Adventure today. I'm so excited I almost peed myself. Well, that reason and the fact that I drank about a million lemonades before dinner yesterday and we only have 3 potties.

~Chris

Keep it Disney.